Do You Really Want To Be Free?

July 21, 2024

I may be dating myself, but remember 1982 when Nancy Regan told the schoolgirl to “just say no” when offered drugs.

If only it were that easy for us.

In Motherhood we all catch ourselves addicted to on some level saying yes, to people pleasing, overfunctioning and feeling compelled to do it all.

However, If you truly want to feel more spacious, empowered, free and relaxed, one skill you must learn is how and when to say no. 

Consciously choosing is a gift that allows you to truly stay aligned with your highest vibration.

And I know first hand that  it’s not always easy. 

I caught myself feeling overwhelmed the other day (well lots of days actually) and thinking I don’t have time to do it all!!! I felt irritated and short tempered and not in a good mood. I was grouchy and rude to my family. Not one of my best mothering moments.

The above are all my personal clues that something is out of alignment for me. So I paused and took a closer look.

What I discovered is that I said yes to too many things. I overrode my personal boundaries. I created the overwhelm by not tuning in and I was pissed, because I stressed myself out. 

I said yes to too many things, again.

I suspect you can relate….

Here is the good news. Learning to say no is a skill you can learn. You might just need a little help tuning in and listening to your body and looking for your Whole Body Yes. 

A Whole Body yes is when all three centers of intelligence are online and aligned. Your head, your heart and your gut.

I have a simple practice that can help you get the clarity you need to feel confident saying no, even when you feel compelled to say yes.

Grab the Whole Body Yes worksheet to get started.

Getting clarity on when to say yes and when to say no has enormous benefits not only for you, but for your family as well.  

Here’s why:

Reduced Stress and Overwhelm: Saying no helps to manage your workload and prevent burnout by not taking on more than you can handle.

Improved Mental Health: Setting boundaries can lead to decreased anxiety and depression, fostering a more positive mindset.

Increased Time for Self-Care: By declining additional responsibilities, you can prioritize your well-being and engage in activities that rejuvenate you.

Better Quality of Life: Focusing on essential tasks and meaningful activities can lead to a more fulfilling and enjoyable life.

Enhanced Personal Growth: Saying no to certain demands allows more time for pursuing the things in life that light you up, your personal interests, hobbies, and goals.

Greater Empowerment and Confidence: Assertively setting boundaries builds self-respect and confidence in your decision-making abilities.

More Energy: Preserving your energy by not overcommitting can lead to feeling way more energetic and less drained.

Plus you help your family:

Cultivate Healthier Relationships: Clear boundaries can lead to more respectful and understanding interactions within the family.

Role Modeling: Mothers who say no when necessary model healthy boundary-setting for their children, teaching them to respect their own limits and those of others.

More Quality Time Together: With less on your plate, you can spend more focused and enjoyable time with the people you love the most.

Reduced Family Stress: A less stressed YOU can create a more relaxed and positive home environment, benefiting everyone’s mental health. Your family entrains to your energy.

Encourages Independence: Family members may learn to take on more responsibilities and become more self-sufficient when mothers delegate tasks or say no.

Better Communication: Open discussions about boundaries can improve communication and understanding among the entire family.

Balanced Expectations: Setting realistic expectations helps everyone in the family understand and respect one another’s needs and limitations, fostering a more supportive environment.

When you learn to say no, you honor yourself, stay connected to the essence of who you truly are and become more authentically available for yourself and those you love.

This is your superpower.

in trust and gratitude,

Annmarie Chereso
Author, Speaker, Coach, & Meditation Teacher