Does the Morning Rush Ruin More Than Your Morning?
August 24, 2025
I remember how stressful it felt getting my kids out the door for school when they were young and how it impacted me and my husband.
Honestly as I think back it was easier when they were little than when they were teens!
It wasn’t just about getting somewhere on time — it was knowing that these few chaotic minutes were setting the tone for the whole day. For them. For me. For all of us.
If you’ve ever had that pit in your stomach before you’ve even had your coffee, you know what I mean.
I’m working with a family right now that brought those memories flooding back.
With two young boys with completely different paces, getting out the door on time is challenging.
One freezes when they feel rushed — completely shuts down.
The other absorbs the tension and winds themselves up like a spring.
Dad learned growing up to push harder, move faster, power through and get it done!
Mom was taught to nurture, slow down, soothe, try to make the transition easier.
And while neither approach is “wrong,” they stress one another out! 😩
So now, it’s not just the kids who are stressed.
The parents are snapping at each other.
The whole house feels tense.
And everyone leaves for the day dysregulated, upset, and disconnected.
Here’s the thing: this isn’t just about getting to school on time. This is about your nervous system — and your family’s collective nervous system.
When you start the day in fight-or-flight mode, it doesn’t just “wear off.”
It stays in your body, coloring how you react to every interaction.
For your kids, those repeated patterns start to wire them for stress and anxiety.
For you and your partner, those repeated patterns start to wire you for disconnection.
And it doesn’t stop when your kids grow up.
The stress points just change.
Maybe it’s about money, or caring for aging parents, or work deadlines.
But the pattern remains the same: your way of handling stress bumps into their way of handling stress — and if you’re not aware, it quietly erodes the connection between you.
The truth is, you can’t stop every stressful moment from happening.
But you can change the way you move through it.
When you learn to regulate yourself, you create enough space to respond instead of react.
You can work with your partner instead of against them.
And you can model for your kids (or anyone who looks to you for guidance) what it looks like to stay connected even (perhaps especially) in the chaos.
On a recent call, my husband and I shared candidly about how we have navigated stress, anxiety and conflict as a couple in a blended family over the years. Here is a sneak peek of that conversation.
And If your mornings — or any part of your day — can feel more like a battlefield than a team sport,
I’d love for you to join me and 7 co-authors of The Perfectly Imperfect Family on August 27th for Back-to-School Anxiety: Real Solutions for Perfectly Imperfect Families.
We’ll talk about how to:
- Keep your cool when the pressure’s on.
- Stay united as a couple, even when you disagree.
- Support your kids without losing yourself in the process.
Because your mornings might be messy — but they don’t have to cost you connection.
in trust and gratitude,
Annmarie Chereso
Author, Speaker, Coach, & Meditation Teacher
PS: If you joined me and Kim for our From Conflict to Connection: Couples Edition conversation, you know we touched on this topic — and so much more about navigating stress and conflict in relationships.
If you missed it, you can watch the replay here: Watch Now
Because whether it’s a rushed school morning or a disagreement at the dinner table… you deserve tools that help you stay connected, no matter what life throws your way.