Do you see what I see?

November 16, 2025

The other day, my husband walked into the room holding something in his hand.

He’d picked up a leaf from the kitchen floor to throw away, but what caught my attention wasn’t the leaf.

It was the hair.

One of my hairs, wrapped around the stem like a tiny thread.

He stood there, listening to me talk, holding this thing between his fingers.

And I remember thinking: Eww..why is he just standing there, holding a piece of my hair? 🤣 (My hair is all over this house so its hard to miss!)

Trying not to sound disgusted, I asked, “Why are you holding a piece of my hair?”

He looked down confused and said, “I’m not holding your hair, I’m holding a leaf!”

Now I was confused. 

I quickly caught myself before slipping into my old righteous pattern — the one who insists he’s wrong and tries to make him see what I’m seeing. (Yes, I do this a lot.)”

Instead, I paused and looked more closely.

Then I saw it. 

The tiny leaf between his thumb and finger AND my hair wrapped around the stem. 

He saw the leaf. I saw the hair.

We were both looking at the exact same thing — but from two completely different perspectives.

This moment hit me because it’s what happens in relationships all the time.

We each see something true, but it’s rarely the whole truth.

I know this has happened to you too.

From your angle, it looks like one thing.

From theirs, something else entirely.

And when you forget that both can be true at once, you fall into conflict fighting to be right about your perspective.

It’s not that either one of you is wrong.

It’s that you are both limited by what you can see from where you’re standing.

In that moment with the leaf, neither of us was ‘wrong’. We just had different views of the same reality.

And that’s what perception does, it filters the world through the lens of our lived experiences, emotions, beliefs, and histories.

When you get stuck in being right, your vision gets smaller.

Your nervous system closes down.
Your heart closes.
You start defending what you see instead of opening to what’s possible.

Totally normal. Being right makes us feel safe and secure.

But when you soften, when you pause and get curious, your field widens and you become available to ask, “What are they seeing that I can’t see yet?”

That question alone shifts everything.

It moves you from certainty to wonder, from separation to connection.

You see, your relationships are invitations to expand your perception, to remember that there’s always more to the story than the view from where you’re standing.

My husband and I were both right that morning.
He saw a leaf.
I saw a hair.
Both of us were right.

And it reminded me that when I open my mind and get curious about what he is seeing, the space between us softens and moments of confusion become moments of connection.

That’s the power of an expanded perspective.

It’s not about being right.

It’s about seeing the whole picture with curiosity.

This is a powerful shift move, when you are open to it.

So, maybe next time you find yourself in disagreement, pause and ask:

✨ What might they be seeing that I can’t yet see?
✨ What part of the picture could I be missing?
✨ What happens when I choose curiosity over certainty?

Because the more you open your perception, the more space you create for connection.

in trust and gratitude,

Annmarie Chereso
Author, Speaker, Coach, & Meditation Teacher